I harbored neither preconceived ideas nor religious values about abortion.
By 1979 I’d had, with my then-husband, two viable births at home. We said to ourselves, that’s it – no more kids. We had replaced ourselves, we were of the ZPG generation – zero population growth.
A plot twist in our lives occurred when I finally acted upon what I had known for years, that I was a lesbian.
I had stayed with my husband because we truly loved each other. Who else would I want to share the births and early years of our two kids with? When I finally found the courage to come out, we had a 4-year-old boy and a 2-year-old girl. We did our own divorce and, as we prepared to separate, we discovered that I was pregnant. I knew instantly. I took two weeks to decide.
I am not religious, but I am spiritual. So I communicated with the spirit of this unborn soul who was knocking on my womb. To her I said: This is not the best time to be born into this family. You should find a family that is really able to do you justice. This will be a difficult transitional time for us.
I had a Maine state-sponsored – for low-income women – abortion at a South Portland clinic on winter solstice, 1979.
Eight years later, the spirit of that same potential being that I had communicated with came to me in my dream. She said: “I am being born tonight into a wonderful family. Thank you for advising that I wait. Everything is good. I love you.” Sure enough, some friends I knew, but was not super close with, gave birth to a baby girl that night. I watched that girl grow up. I once bought a pot holder at her yard sale. She is now a successful 40-something-year-old woman.
The question of abortion should be a moot point.
America is not a theocracy. Religions and governments should not be able force their beliefs on others. It does not matter what you – or I – think about “when life begins,” or if an unborn fetus is a “baby. ” You do as you believe, I do as I believe.
There is no need for enforcement from either side. Abortion is not about what you think. Abortion is not anyone’s decision, except the woman whose body and life are her own property. I believe there should be no laws concerning a woman’s body made by anyone but herself.
Women of all ages need to speak out now. Our bodies do not belong to the federal government, to your religion, or to the Supreme Court. I am the only one who will decide if there will be life growing inside me.
To have or not to have a baby is for me, at age 74, a moot point now. But for my daughters and granddaughters, and for all women, I will keep on fighting for our reproductive freedom and our right to control our own bodies. I hope you will, too.
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