The undead are well fed on Tootsie Pops and Smarties during the Halloween season. But what’s a long-deceased fellow have to do for a bite to eat the rest of the year?
It’s not like the decrepit guy can wander into Hannaford for some tater tots and a liter of Pepsi. He’s already tried, and was politely told not to return until he’s able to abide by the grocer’s “No shirt, no skin, no service” policy. Besides, it has to be frustrating to get an apple stuck in his ribs every time he leans over the produce bin.
Placing an order for delivery isn’t easy either. Directing the pizza guy to drop the pepperoni pie at plot No. 47 in Portland’s Eastern Cemetery is a pretty quick way to get hung up on.
It can be a hungry 11 months waiting for another Halloween season, especially since eating the living is generally frowned upon these days.
A convenient alternative has long been insects. Wriggling moth larvae don’t make every mouth water, but a zombie’s got to eat. And a bowl of crispy crickets makes for a decent snack for our friends six feet under.
People who happen to still be living can eat like the undead during the Creepy Halloween Celebration on Saturday at College of the Atlantic’s George B. Dorr Museum of Natural History.
Plenty of creepy crawlies will be available to see, touch and eat, including chocolate-covered crickets, roasted mealworms served on crackers, and boiled crickets “elegantly skewered like the most proper of hors d’oeuvres.”
And in an insect twist of what-goes-around-comes-around, there will also be a jar of flesh-eating beetles in attendance.
Visitors can also explore the art of taxidermy and look a skeleton right in the eye socket. Upstairs, the kids can scare up Halloween masks and monsters made from natural materials.
The event runs from 5 to 7 p.m., and there’s a suggested donation of $2 for children and $3.50 for adults.
IF SIMPLY IMITATING the eating habits of the interred isn’t enough, you can commune with corpses at the Eastern Cemetery.
The Walk Among the Shadows tour guides visitors through the rows of headstones to meet famous residents of Portland’s oldest major cemetery. There’s no sixth sense required; the dead are portrayed by actors from Acorn Productions and Portland Playback.
Tourgoers might meet Susan Bluefield, who died in the Great Fire of 1866; Samuel Proctor, son of John Proctor of the Salem witch trials; William Burrows and Samuel Blythe, War of 1812 sea captains; or Dan Manley, Portland’s first bank robber.
The ghost bride of Portland may also make an ethereal appearance, according to Holly Doggett, a volunteer with Spirits Alive. The local organization is dedicated to the Eastern Cemetery’s preservation.
The stories told during the tour are all based on history, Doggett said. “The people that are buried there are the people our streets are named after.”
It’s a paranormal opportunity to hear some Portland history right from the corpse’s mouth. It’s also a chance to creep through the dimly lit cemetery in the safety of numbers.
The tours run from 6:30 to 7:30 p.m. today, tomorrow and Saturday, and Oct. 28-30 at the same time. Tickets are $10 for adults and $5 for children 12 and under.
Walk Among the Shadows is first-come, first-served, so you’ll want to get in line early. Or bribe your way in with some delicacies for the dead — mealworms with extra butter.
Staff Writer Shannon Bryan can be contacted at 791-6333 or at: sbryan@mainetoday.com
Send questions/comments to the editors.
