Another Iraq benefit: A recent Rand study forecasts as many as 300,000 Iraq war vets suffer from either brain injury or post traumatic stress requiring medical treatment for many years. The Army suicide hotline is reporting over 1,000 calls a week.
Hookers in the wild: Scientists have long observed that food or services are exchanged for sexual favors among species such as penguins or hummingbirds. A University of Michigan study revealed that as many as a quarter of students consciously or unconsciously attempted to trade sex for goods.
Ron Paul Follies: The occupational classification of those who contributed to Ron Paul’s presidential campaign: lawyers – around 50 million bucks, mostly Democrats; CEOs and “executives” – about evenly divided between Republicans and Democrats; “people in the media” – almost all Dems. The last category was “sex slave,” a Republican who gave just over $400.
Subsidies: A barrel of ethanol costs just over $100. Our government kicks in an average of $49 in subsidies for each barrel. If the government would do that for our light bills we could all heat with electricity.
Equal opportunity ignorance: A recent survey of American teenagers revealed that 25 percent of them could not identify Adolph Hitler, and a third did not know that the Bill of Rights guarantees free speech and freedom of religion. Concerning Watergate, 11 percent thought that Eisenhower was forced from office by the scandal, but another 11 percent thought it was Truman.
Depression salaries: The top 25 Wall Street earners this past year each received pay of at least $360 million. One hard-working fund manager earned $3.4 billion – nearly twice Maine’s annual budget. Maybe we could sell the state to him next year.
Unexpected consequences: In New York, “Viagra-fueled” extra-marital affairs now are the cause of 5 percent of divorce fillings. In Maine, that’s the “Way Life Ought to Be.”
Drill or plant? In 1998 a barrel of oil bought five bushels of corn. Today it buys 20.
Steak house blues: The United Nations Food and Agricultural Organization says that animal husbandry produces more greenhouse gases than all world transportation. Gas produced by politicians is somewhat less, but generous.
New strategy: When Gen. Petraeus appeared before Congress in April, there were approximately 90,000 “Sons of Iraq” – or, as the general phrased it, “ethnosectarian” Iraqis – being paid directly by the U.S. not to fight us. That may be the answer to pulling out American troops – put the entire country of Iraq on the U.S. payroll.
Ma, who’s my Pa? Rite-Aid is now selling home paternity kits for $150. A simple swab taken from inside the cheek of the child, mother and claimant will provide a yes or no in three to five days. Time enough to plan an escape.
State budget: Maine “clean elections,” where the taxpayer foots the bill for lawn signs, TV ads, coffee and doughnuts, cost close to $18 for each Maine voter in the last general election – an amount sufficient to hire 145 new teachers.
Housing inflation: Last year 17 apartments (condos) costing more than $10 million each were sold in New York City. This year 71 similar units have already found buyers.
Beliefs: Roughly the same number of Americans (30-40 percent) believe in flying saucers as believe in evolution. A 2006 Ohio University poll found that 26 percent of Americans believe that our own government assisted in the 9/11 attack in order to justify the Iraq war. Thirty percent of American blacks believe that AIDS was enabled by the government simply to kill blacks.
Decline: If there is any doubt that the quality of conservative thought has gone downhill, observe the slide from Bill Buckley to Bill O’Reilly.
Prison blues: Due almost entirely to the so-called War on Drugs, the U.S. has 2.3 million men and women incarcerated – 400 percent more than the population of the U.S. armed forces. Our rate of imprisonment is five times that of Great Britain and Spain. The good news is that Maine has the lowest percentage of people in prison of any state.
Buy defense stocks: In 2006, more than a half of all the dollars spent directly on Iraq went to private contractors. ($294.9 billion out of $522.5 billion)
Kill the ump: In what economists call “self-interest bias,” fans of one ball team will always claim twice as many fouls on their own team as do fans of the opposing team. This may be said to be true of politicians.
Wind in your hair: Since 27 states have dropped mandatory helmet laws for motorcyclists, the death toll among those adventurers has more than doubled, from 2,160 to 4,810.
Rodney Quinn, who lives in Gorham, is a former Maine secretary of state. He can be reached at rquinn@maine.rr.com.
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